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We Bought A Zoo (2011) -vs- Jerry Maguire (1996)

December 22, 2011 Ben Silverio 2

Before Jeremy Piven’s Ari Gold, Tom Cruise as Jerry Maguire embodied everything most of us know about big-time entertainment agents. They can be weaselly in their business dealings, but they must have a raccoon’s ingenuity mixed with the predatory skills of a tiger to fight for their clients’ interests. So what would happen if we put up one of these movie agents against a group of actual animals? […]

The Adventures of Tintin in 3D (2011)

December 15, 2011 Ian Abrams 1

Tintin felt like a real missed opportunity.

When you create a world inside a computer, isn’t one of the advantages that you can do things that you can’t do with brick-and-mortar sets and flesh-and-blood actors? Tintin only really comes alive during a couple of gigantic set pieces—a chase through an Arab village, a duel with cargo cranes—that would have been prohibitively expensive to do pre-CGI. The rest of the time, it’s like we’re watching actors wearing too much foundation.

The plot itself is creaky, starting with a ridiculous coincidence, and lurching forward from there. But the real disappointment is that despite the intricate motion-capture used to create them on screen, the characters are all lifeless. What makes Indiana Jones so wonderful is the emotion that Harrison Ford illuminates him with—his delight, when he feels it (his reunion with Marion in Crystal Skull) is glowing and childlike, but most of the time he seems to face the world with something like resigned annoyance (“Snakes. Why’d it have to be snakes?”). It’s that personality that locks us into the character and the movie. […]

A Dangerous Method (2011) -vs- Final Analysis (1992)

December 12, 2011 Arthur Tiersky 3

Hunky Shrinks and the Hot Chicks Who Sleep with Them! An episode of Montel? No…, well, probably yes, that too, but also the subject of this week’s Hot Smackdown! The recent release of A Dangerous Method, a mostly stodgy, stately tale of Sigmund Freud, Carl Jung and the early days of psychiatry, immediately got us wondering when director David Cronenberg […]

New Year’s Eve (2011) -vs- Valentine’s Day (2010)

December 9, 2011 Lissa Coffey 3

Every holiday comes with its baggage—the expectations, the pressures put on relationships, the sometimes-painful memories and the hope that somehow, some way, this year will be different. So it is with this Smackdown. Can New Year’s Eve improve on Valentine’s Day, which audiences seemed to like despite the widespread critical takedowns? […]

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (2011) -vs- The Spy Who Came in From the Cold (1965)

December 8, 2011 Eric Volkman 0

This is not only a spy vs. spy, top-secret Smackdown, it’s a battle pitting a storied author against himself. John Le Carre’s compelling, plot-heavy novels have consistently provided raw material for movies since the mid-1960s, and if the budget of the latest adaptation, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, is any indication, that trend is likely to continue for longer than the duration of the Cold War. […]

The Sitter (2011) -vs- Adventures in Babysitting (1987)

December 8, 2011 Sarah Harding 3

It’s hard work being a babysitter in Hollywood. Instead of settling the kids down for a night of movies and TV dinners, you’re more likely to be stalked by a sadistic killer (Halloween), have a heart attack (Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead), endure increasingly threatening phone calls (When a Stranger Calls) or find yourself trying to rescue your charge from the Goblin King (Labyrinth). […]

Young Adult (2011) -vs- My Best Friend’s Wedding (1997)

December 8, 2011 Jackie Zabel 0

A beautiful, still-single woman decides that all the good guys are taken. The solution? Take one back, and by any means necessary. That’s pretty much the high concept behind both Young Adult, screenwriter Diablo Cody’s new black comedy bravely starring Charlize Theron as a Minnesota high school beauty queen coming back to rekindle the flame with her married-with-baby ex-boyfriend, and My Best Friend’s Wedding, a Julia Roberts vehicle in which she travels back to Chicago to reclaim a sportswriter she never really wanted until another girl (Cameron Diaz) decides he’s marriage material. […]

Shame (2011) -vs- I Am a Sex Addict (2005)

December 1, 2011 Arthur Tiersky 0

Why aren’t there more movies about sexual addiction?

Possibly because it sounds like sort of a self-defeating topic for a film. Those in the mood for a “sex” film generally don’t want to see it paired with a downer word like “addiction” and those seeking an addiction film are perhaps more sympathetic to tangible, physical addictions such as to booze (Leaving Las Vegas), drugs (Trainspotting) or anything not nailed down (the inevitable Winning! The Charlie Sheen Story). […]

Hugo (2011) -vs- Pinocchio (1940)

November 22, 2011 Ben Silverio 4

Walt Disney and Martin Scorsese — two names that stand out in the pantheon of cinema legends. Both have made indelible contributions both to the world of film and to popular culture. Now, for the first time ever, they’re in the same weight class, so we’re bringing them together for what’s sure to be a classic Smackdown. […]

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