News Ticker

July 2011

Harry Potter -vs- The Lord of the Rings

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (2011) -vs- The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)

July 15, 2011 Eric Volkman 31

One finale to rule them all! Two beloved (not to mention lucrative) film franchises come to an end with these offerings and, more momentously, face each other in a Movie Smackdown of truly epic proportions.

The stakes in the two stories are similarly high, with heroes who’ve had the odds gradually stacked against them to the point of near-impossibility for success. In The Return of the King, the spirit of the evil sorcerer Sauron — in the form of a fiery, all-seeing Eye — lives and schemes for total victory against our vulnerable protagonists. Meanwhile, in Potter-land, Team Harry has to mount a quick and effective defense against Voldemort and his army, who are on the brink of completely taking over the magic world, destroying Hogwarts and killing its good students and faculty.

The sword-wielding, ring-bearing humans, hobbits and elves of Peter Jackson’s ultimate Rings face off against the spells and talismans of Harry and his young wizard pals. Which side will prevail? […]

Kutcher to the Max

No Strings Attached (2011) -vs- What Happens in Vegas (2008)

July 15, 2011 Arthur Tiersky 6

Ashton Kutcher has led a charmed life. Since breaking out as a sitcom star with That ‘70s Show in 1998, he married Hot Babe Brat-Packer-Turned-Actress-Turned-Celebrity Demi Moore and produced and hosted a veritable buttload of mindless but lucrative reality shows. Now, the undisputed Twitter king and anti-child-pornography crusader, he’s been recruited to fill the puke-stained shoes of Charlie Sheen on sitcom cash cow Two and a Half Men, leaving America relieved that Sheen did not, despite concerns, do enough cocaine to kill two and a half men, but at the same time alarmed by the potential disruption this will cause to Ashton’s film career.

Yes, Kutcher has also starred in several movies, the lion’s share of which were broad comedies largely ignored by America, fortunately for Kutcher (and America). Earlier this year, however, it seemed like he was dipping his toes into the water of more mature projects such as No Strings Attached, a fairly realistic comedy/drama/romance, which featured no less than two Oscar winners as well as that Indian chick from The Office (Mindy Kaling).

With Kutcher set to (temporarily at least) abandon filmdom for TMZ’s favorite sitcom, it’s time to evaluate his still-young career once and for all: Is Kutcher a major movie talent whose agents having trouble finding him the right projects, or did his film career peak early with Dude, Where’s My Car, essentially a rehashing, so to speak, of his success on That ‘70s Show, thus making his U-turn back to sitcom-land a wise career move?
[…]

Spider-Man Gets New Threads

July 14, 2011 Movie Smackdown 5

Now that re-boots are planned while the last re-boot is finishing its run, it’s back to the beginning for Spider-Man in the new imagining. Because this version known as The Amazing Spider-Man is set in high school, it’s out with old-man Tobey Maguire and in with new-guy Andrew Garfield. Although to be honest, Garfield is like only seven years younger than Maguire and would probably last about five minutes in a real high school before somebody outed him as an undercover cop or something.

But this is Hollywood, so never mind. Along with the new actor, Spidey is getting a new costume. And the new costume is getting its coming out party in this week’s Entertainment Weekly with a cover splash (seen here) and a collection of other photos showing off the new look.

We first got a look at the suit six months ago, so in the carefully orchestrated run up to release, it’s time to throw some more fuel on the fire. It’s all timed for fan boys and girls in anticipation of next week’s trailer premiere and San Diego Comic-Con panel. That trailer is rumored to be first scene by the public in advance of the July 22nd release of Captain America: The First Avenger. […]

Harry Potter and the Final Curtain

Goodbye, Harry Potter

July 11, 2011 R.L. Naquin 3

Thirteen years ago, J. K. Rowling captured lightning in a bottle and stamped it across Harry’s forehead as his signature scar.

The success of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone was unexpected, came out of nowhere, and swept across the world in a feeding frenzy. Momentum gathered, and the first movie, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, was released three short years later. What followed was a phenomenon both the publishing and the film industries will be hard-pressed to duplicate.

This week’s release of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 has been ten years in coming, and we’ve journeyed far with the characters. From the first movie to the last, change drove the franchise forward. There was nothing stagnant about the characters or the films. […]

Horrible Bosses -vs- Office Space

Horrible Bosses (2011) -vs- Office Space (1999)

July 11, 2011 Rebecca Coffindaffer 2

We love to watch glamorous Hollywood people be glamorous. More than that, we love to watch glamorous Hollywood people pretend to be Just Like Us and satirize the humdrum jobs the majority of Americans — at least, those of us lucky enough to be employed — are stuck with.

That’s the reason workplace comedies go over so well: They’re accessible and relatable, and God, don’t we all need a good laugh to get through the work week now and again. It’s a time-honored tradition from The Apartment to 9 to 5, and it even includes Dilbert and The Office, for those whose tastes run toward comic strips and TV.

When these satirized workers, over-burdened with indignities, finally snap, we get an offshoot of the office comedy — the Everyman-gets-his-revenge line, which serves up a satisfying order of comeuppance along with the laughs. Mike Judge’s Office Space typifies this subgenre, looking to prove there are still plenty of laughs to be milked from the rebellion of the American cubicle jockey. Now Horrible Bosses takes the ring against it with an impressive opening weekend at the box office. […]

Zookeeper -vs- Dr. Dolittle

Zookeeper (2011) -vs- Dr. Dolittle (1998)

July 10, 2011 Nicole Marchesani 2

Animals have more acute senses than people do and an entirely different way of looking at things, so it stands to reason that audiences have been lapping up talking animal stories since that snake was introduced in the first act of Genesis. Hollywood really pricked up its ears back in ’98, when the Dr. Dolittle remake starring Eddie Murphy became the highest grossing live-action film ever made in the genre. That’s when the industry started tossing them out like so many chew-toys: the Babe sequel, Stuart Little, Narnia… and that doesn’t even count animation.

Now, along comes Zookeeper, which has more than a few things in common with the good Doctor: a depressed animal that needs tender loving care, a know-it-all beast that dispenses good advice when necessary, a really annoying creature that talks too much, and a likable human being — in this case played by Kevin James — who has less success with his own species than he does with his furry friends. Dr. Dolittle and Zookeeper both go for the laughs, but both also play as wish-fulfillment for the odd duck within us all — the one that craves a little primal understanding when we don’t quite fit in. […]

The Chameleon -vs- Changeling

The Chameleon (2011) -vs- Changeling (2008)

July 9, 2011 Ben Silverio 3

“Based on a true story” is where the real world and the cinematic world collide. Whether it be a romantic comedy, a micro-budget horror movie, or a courtroom drama, a film with that label carries weight vicariously, intriguing viewers with the promise that the story, or something like it, actually occurred and in fact could have happened to them.

Both The Chameleon and Changeling explore cases of unexpected reappearances of missing children and the dark secrets surrounding their returns. However, the two films take different approaches in point of view. In The Chameleon, the story is about a professional liar assuming a missing teenage boy’s identity, while Changeling focuses on a mother who, after her nine-year-old son is kidnapped, must deal with the trauma when police return the wrong child and insist he’s her son.

These stories involve what Hollywood sometimes calls “difficult subject matter,” which may be why Changeling, despite an A-List pedigree and considerable critical success, performed only modestly at the box office. The fact that it was based on a true story may have helped in some ways and hurt in others. Now viewers have the chance to experience two nightmarish family dramas, their attention heightened by the knowledge that both films hew more or less closely to true events. For those who can only take so much family angst, clearly a Smackdown is in order. Accept no substitutes. […]

Top 10 Horrible Movie Bosses

Top 10 Horrible Movie Bosses

July 7, 2011 The FilmGuru 5

This week, Horrible Bosses comes to theaters. Movies about the workplace are as old as the art of cinema. And while we usually go to the movies to escape the real world, sometimes reality can’t help but leak through. We often see characters we recognize, and that even includes bosses.

In Horrible Bosses, Nick Hendricks (Jason Bateman), Dale Arbus (Charlie Day) and Kurt Buckman (Jason Sudeikis) have had it with their bosses. But what can you do when your boss is a psycho, a man-eater, or a total tool? Quitting is not an option. So, the guys devise a convoluted but foolproof plan to rid the world of their respective employers… permanently.

We’re not recommending that our readers end bad workplace relationships so drastically. The truth is, no matter how bad your boss is, it could be worse.

We wouldn’t wish these bosses on anyone. These are the baddest of the bad. So the next time your boss is hounding you about missed deadlines or asking you to help him download Angry Birds on his iPhone, remember that it could be worse. You could have one of these cinematic horrible VIPs. […]

The Tree of Life (2011) -vs- The Fountain (2006)

July 6, 2011 Mark Sanchez 9

The universe is full of mystery: What is the meaning of life? Why are we here? If God exists, why does He allow evil? And perhaps most perplexing of all, how did not one, but two Hollywood productions in the last five years attract major financing for projects tackling those kinds of questions without linear stories that film critics, not to mention common moviegoers, could understand?

Well, the good Lord works in mysterious ways, and in the case of writer-director Terrence Malick’s The Tree of Life (now in theaters) and The Fountain (2006), written and directed by Darren Aronofsky with help on the story from Ari Handel, we are arguably better off for it.

Reactions are all over the lot on Malick’s latest opus, and so is the film, which examines a Texas family’s extended life and reaches for an emotional link connecting it to all of creation. Aronofsky’s metaphysical missile, on the other hand, describes a parabola between life and death, attempting to shed light on life’s essence through a sort of tag-team narrative, part of which deals with a literal search for — wait for it — the tree of life. […]

Transformers Trilogy

Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011) -vs- Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009) -vs- Transformers (2007)

July 4, 2011 Rodney Twelftree 2

The ultimate Hollywood movie pitch would have gone something like this: let’s get some giant alien robots, who can change into a variety of cars, planes and other machines, bring their eon-long war to Earth. A young teenage boy befriends one of these robots, and assists the Autobots in their battle against Megatron and the Decepticons. Cue massive destruction and special effects. Sure, that’ll work! Michael Bay’s epic trilogy of transforming robotic lifeforms comes to a conclusion with 2011’s Dark of The Moon, the blow-out finale to what has been, effectively, a massive financial success for Paramount Pictures. In this Smackdown, take a look at each of the three films and see which one truly does deliver more than meets the eye!

Dark Of The Moon is the most recent Transformers movie to be released, and is by far the most accomplished in terms of production design and scale. The finale of Michael Bay’s involvement with the robotic saga comes to a blistering conclusion with the near-obliteration of Chicago, and the resolution of Sam’s isolation from his Autobot pals. Yes, Sam’s finished college, and is out in the workforce looking for a job – something he’s finding difficult while he’s living with the gorgeous replacement for Mikaela, Carly. He’s also a little angry at being frozen out of contact with Bumblebee and the Autobots, since their missions with the US military to locate and prevent Decepticons rising up once more has taken precedence over the young mans friendship. […]

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